Tag Archives: China

China Sex Fantasy



My Chinese name is Weiling but ever since I came to England I ask people to call me Ling. People can remember it easily and it saves time too.  My parents were really against the idea of me coming to London to study, they thought it would be difficult for me to survive in another country, especially one as far away as England.  But really they just wanted me keep an eye on me, so that I didn’t get into any trouble. Chinese parents really like to keep an eye on their children, and it doesn’t stop when they start university, with many students living at home, especially if they’re girls. 

I came to London last summer, and I’ve been here almost a year. It took me a while to get used to the differences. The hardest part was the weather. I seriously thought I would quit after the  first month. The first thing I did was find some Chinese restaurants – Chinatown has quite a few, but I started to eat English food, and it was really good. Especially the bread, cheese and roast dinner. But the thing I like the most about England are the men – and it’s really easy to meet them here, because they love women from China. 

I laughed the first time I heard the phrase ‘yellow fever’ – I had no idea that men would be attracted to women for being Asian. But there are lots of Chinese women studying here, and my friends all told me that they started receiving a lot of attention when they first came here. I can go out to the café, or take the tube, and I only need to wait five minutes before someone comes up to me for whatever reason.

I have met men in clubs but I find it’s a lot of effort to go to all that trouble. This particular occasion happened one afternoon when I was out shopping in Regent Street.  I went there to look at some of the dresses in TopShop. I like the styles they have, most of it changes all the time, but you can always find something good there. My figure is slim, and I can wear a UK small size. I’m nearly five foot 6, which is on the tall side for a lot of Asian women. I have good legs, and my bust is modest but firm. My breasts are definitely there, even if they aren’t as large as some English girls’. Naturally, my hair is black, but I like to colour it on occasion, and sometimes I have even been blonde.

I was looking around the store for a while without buying anything. The music was starting to bother me so I went to the Starbucks on Berkeley Square.  I like to watch some of the rich people as they hurry out of their taxi and into one of the expensive member’s clubs.  Sometimes English men dress really scruffily, I can’t tell if they’re homeless or actually millionaires. 
 
I was waiting in the queue for my matcha latte and as I was about to pay this guy approached me and asked me if I would like to sit down and join him. I was feeling bored at the time so I told him I didn’t mind.  And also since he looked so dreamy I really couldn’t miss the chance to get close to him.  We talked a lot and when I finished my coffee he asked if I would like another. From his subtle (but expensive) clothes I could see that he could afford it, so I accepted his offer. 

“Well, would you like to have dinner?” We had been talking for nearly two hours…
”Well thanks, “ I said. “Just a small something because I don’t like to eat late.”
We carried on getting to know each other over dinner – which was at a small Italian serving elaborate small plates of cicceti. 
It was nearly 9, And I knew my housemates would be out somewhere, because we always went out on Thursday. 
“Ok, I said. I don’t normally do this. I live by the UCL building. You can come now because there’s no one home. But you have to be gone by 12, ok?”
“I’m sure we can find something to do in that time.”
“Good.” 
“He took his scarf off the table and wrapped it around his neck. 
We soon arrived at my flat, and I managed to get him inside without anyone seeing us.  He started kissing me as soon as we got inside, first gently and then more forcefully with his tongue pushing mine more firmly. I let him use his hands on me while I pulled him closer. We made out like this for some time before I pushed him gently away,.
“Just a second,  we should move to the bedroom , but give me a minute, ok?”
I wanted him to wait whilst I changed into something very sexy. I keep a lot of red underwear to sleep in, it’s a difficult colour but I think it matches my skin tone very well, and most men who see me in it agree.
“Ling? Can I Come in now?”
“Come in and fuck me hard.”
I can talk dirty when I’m in the mood.
I got on to my bed and opened my legs for him. 
“Come on, I’m already so wet.”
I pulled him on the bed and unbuttoned his shirt, took off his jeans and removed his boxer shorts. His cock was hardening, and I could see his balls tightening, they were so big he was going to have a lot of cum I could tell. I opened my legs as wide as I could and grabbed his hand and shoved it inside my underwear, so that he could feel my shaved vagina and then slowly work his fingers inside me. 
 
 
“DO you like that? “
“I love it , come on baby, I’m getting so wet.”
HE removed my underwear whilst the top half was still on. 
His face was staring directly at my pussy. It was as if he hadn’t seen one for a very long time. 
“Are you going to stare at it or are you gonna eat it?”
He climbed on the bed and got his head right in between my legs. He was staring at it like he didn’t know what to do.  Just put your tongue in and move it up and down. Then make a seal with your lips like you’re kissing someone. 
He got closer and then gently pushed his tongue inside me so that I could feel his warmth breath on me and I started to get a tingling feeling, and I had to steady my legs to stop my knees buckling. 
Keep going I told him. Do it to me harder.  I got my hands around his neck so that he was though to go deeper inside with my tongue, as he brought me off with my first orgasm I let him free temporarily. 
“ are you going to fuck me now?”
I pulled his cock up to my mouth and gave it some caressing strokes with my tongue, and used my hands on the warm skin underneath his balls to fluff them and keep them tight, I pulled my mouth away as his cock was starting to hit the back of my throat, his cock sprung upwards as it came out of my mouth. He moved downwards and easily put his dick into me, I was so wet that it met no resistance.  
He was hitting me with energy but I wanted more powerful sex.
I let him take me from behind which allowed his entire cock to enter me, and I came several times like this.  
I wanted to ride him next so I sat over him with my legs and let him thrust his way inside. 
“Oh my god, I’m coming. “ He pulled out just in time and I took his cock in my hand. The semen shot out in warm jets, it covered my hands, slid dowm my fingers and I used my hand to stroke him until he was totally spent. 
I asked him if I was his first Asian girl and he said yes. I was happy that I could have this honour and I look forward to being another guy’s Asian first!
 
 
 


 

China Love Cupid – dating site review

If you’re like me and you love Asian girls, you’ll want to do everything you can to meet as many of them as you can. When it comes to meeting girls abroad, you need to check out the dating sites. About the biggest one in terms of members is the lovecupid site. Signing up to make a profile is really easy. They break things down into categories where you can list your age, ethnicity and background. Then you can go into more detail, and do the same for the kind of things you are looking for in your partner. What I like about this site is it’s so straightforward. You can search girls based on certain parameters. Not only that, but the ‘online chat’ allows you to find girls who are online and available to chat.

Sign up cost

Like any dating site that you will want to join, you need to pay a membership fee to be able to access the benefits of the website. China Lovecupid charges a monthly fee for access to most of the features. You’ll need to pay this to send messages and reply to girls who message you. Premium membership is currently £11.00 a month, billed in one payment of £131 a year. I opted for the standard membership which is a little cheaper.

The girls

So once you’ve signed up, you want to get to know the girls. For me, China Cupid has the most girls of the various sites in the LoveCupid dating media. Not surprising really, as China is massive. Girls are eager to get chatting right away, and here it pays to be a white man from England or USA. The girls on here are 90% really good, with a few probable fakes. looks play a big part for a lot of women who are open about their wish to marry and start a family. Quite a few of the photos look very staged, with a lot of editing clearly having been done. That said, once you get to know them, ask them to show you some more recent photos of themselves.

Messaging

You can send messages on tinder and OkCupid and get no reply, but here women respond straight away.

I had several message me upfront. Often, they will send fairly generic messages along the lines of ‘I would like to get to know you more’. But you can soon move things forward, and after a few messages, you will need to get their WeChat to make things more intimate. Don’y be surprised if the girls start messaging you often, asking how you are, sending photos of themselves. It’s a reminder of how different the dating culture is in Asia. Another thing you will find is just how many women using the site are divorced, even the younger ones. The stigma against divorced women is where it really pays to sign up. Whereas most men in China won’t touch a married woman, I like to feel that westerners are more open-minded. Most women have been very open about why they are looking for western men.

For me, I have at times struggled to focus, because of the sheer volume of women. But you can narrow things down so that you focus on women from a particular region. I have found that women from Gangzhou province are particularly warm, friendly, and sexy. On the other hand, women in Shanghai and Beijing seem slightly more aloof and more difficult to impress.

Verdict.

Any site has to be judged on the quality of its members. ChinaCupid really delivers. The youngest girls I’ve chatted to are 19, going up to 70. I’ve chatted to a few milfs, still looking good in their fifties. On the whole, I have had the most success with women in their mid twenties to early thirties. Most of the women have enough English to send messages and a few will ask for video chat too. You’ll want to join this site if you are planning a trip to China. Which is exactly what I will be doing next year.

Zia

I met Zia at one of the outdoor film screenings in London in the summer. She has a very cute face with well-sized brown eyes. Sometimes she wears glasses, which complement her general demeanor, which I would describe as sexy-anime style geek. I first thought she might have been from the Philippines but she is actually from China. The best thing about her are her large, double D breasts, which she likes to show off in a range of low-cut dresses and tops. I went on a couple of dates before taking her home with me.

I got her to sit facing me, and I pulled her closer to me. As we kissed, I felt her soft tongue on mine. I caressed her upper body and she began to moan loudly. I thought she was going to lose her balance so I led her to the bed.

All night I had been staring at her breasts, which seemed to be barely covered by her play-suit. I pulled it down from the back to reveal her pink two-tone bra. I caressed her breasts for a while over the material and enjoyed the sensation. Eventually I had to see them properly/. they really were some of the best breasts I have seen – soft, well-proportioned and with areolae that are good sized. When you get an Asian girl with large breasts you need to pay them a lot of attention and this was how it was on this occasion. I rubbed them with both hands and kissed them all over. I took Zia and positioned her on top so that I could get a good view of them, and let them brush up against me.

Zia carried on moaning and I could tell that she enjoyed the attention she was getting. I had already taken off my clothes. It was time for fucking. Zia took hold off my cock and stroked it for a while until it was hard. I pulled down her underwear and could see that she had a lot of pubic hair. I’ve been with several Chinese girls – enough to know that this is normal – but you might need to adjust your expectations.

By now I was very hard and I couldn’t wait to get my cock inside her. Zia was tight but I was able to get inside her nearly all the way, she started to moan that it was really hard. Zia started to grind herself against me, and then she was asking if I liked her. I enjoyed having Zia’s breasts banging against me so much that I forgot to change things up. Luckily I managed to take her from the side for several strokes, getting a decent grasp of her glorious breasts as I did so. I was feeling really horny – the combination of Zia’s lovely breasts and skin was knocking me out. I pulled out and moved zIA on her back. I use missionary when I am nearly ready to come. I like to be able to look at the girl and hold her hands whilst kissing her at the same time. Soon, I was coming. I let Zia carry on thrusting against me for a while afterwards as I filled the condom.

Verdict: satisfying sexual encounter. I loved Zia’s body – some Chinese girls are very small but Zia’s body had a slight layer of fat that made her very soft and her breasts were superb. If you get a girl with big tits and a smallish figure you are just golden. I would have liked it if she could have been a little more dominant, but all in all it was a great night with her.

Flight of fantasy

The plane seemed to have been travelling forever. They had been in the air for a few hours, but the time seemed to be going more slowly up there. The plane had made it’s ascent from a London airport a few hours ago, at 2:30 local time. Now it was impossible to know where exactly the plane was, there was nothing outside the window to indicate the country they were flying over. Only two hours earlier, the food trolley had wheeled its way down the aisle and he had selected his meal.

Now he was well into the flight. He had taken his shoes off and was enjoying the in-flight entertainment system. The movie was about a father who had become reunited with his daughter after many years apart. What made it more moving was that the daughter only had a few months to live. When he got to the end of the film he felt like crying.  HE gazed around at the other passengers. They were all absorbed in their various activities. Some were trying to sleep, their neck pillows awkwardly positioned in the headrests. Others were looking at their laptops. They didn’t seem very interesting to him. HE wondered why so few people really cared about their journey, or where they were flying to. The flight attendants had served everybody in great time, and had poured the coffee as he was still eating his steak. He looked at his watch. Local time was 7:30 and he didn’t feel very sleepy. In fact, the coffee had given him jolt of extra energy. Sat in his chair, he felt restless, his body did not want to be still.

He decided to get up and explore. The plane was not entirely full. There were several empty seats around him. In fact, it was not often that there were so many seats on an international flight. There were usually several children and a crying baby that would stay up on the journey. Surprisingly, this time there were no children on board. In fact, most of the passengers were travelling alone and weren’t the usual holiday-goers. The other thing he noticed about them was they didn’t have much luggage with them. Usually travellers carried bags of duty free, they had bags of shopping and various carry on. But this flight was different. They had boarded with minimal luggage, and more to the point, they were exceptionally    quiet, which was odd for people going on holiday who would normally be excitedly talking about their destination.
The flight attendants were all female. He didn’t expect this to be so but it was always pleasant when they were, and occasionally he flew with other airlines and was shocked to find men serving amongst the women. 1

“Can I get you any drinks?”

Usually the use of ‘get’ in this way bothered him but right now he was enjoying the experience of being served by this woman that it was too much for it to bother him. The attendant had to lean over him to pass his glass of wine to him and the feeling of her apron against his shirt made him tingle with pleasure.

Would you like me to bring you something else?” she asked him?

He thought for a moment. There were lots of things he would have liked to get from her. She was wearing a bright red apron with embroidered patterns on it. Her dress was regulation length but he could see that she had good legs. Here height was at most 170cms (and he didn’t mind; he had never liked tall women anyway.

Then he heard an announcement over the plane’s loudspeaker.

“This is your captain speaking. We are currently experiencing some turbulence, Please stay in your seats and keep your seatbelt fastened.”

HE watched as the flight attendants quickly got back to their seats, which were somewhere at the back of the plane.

He hoped that the turbulence would be over quickly. As he fastened his seatbelt, he thought what a wonder it was to be flying. There was no other transport that came close. It was when he was in an aircraft that he felt he could relax properly, a place where no one could get to him. He enjoyed being up in the sky for several hours at once. Time seemed to stop. The plane started to shake violently. It must have been a storm that caused it to flap around so much. Whatever it was, he thought about the flight attendants in the plane. Where did they go at times like these? On a ten-hour flight, he only saw them during take-off and when they were serving the in-flight meals. There weren’t any seats back in economy for them to properly lay down in.  Unless there happened to be some private rooms tucked away, they must have been sitting in cramped seats no bigger than the one he was sitting in at that moment.

AS the plane began to steady itself, he waited for the seatbelt sign to be switched off so that he could move about on the plane. He also wanted to see where the special flight attendant was sitting so that he could talk to her again. Would she be wearing her high-heeled shoes? Or would she have slipped them off? Feet could swell, he knew, although he couldn’t imagine this would be a big problem for her. If she was relaxing, would she be sleeping, or was she required to stay awake for the entire duration of the flight? It led to other questions. Where did they change clothes? How did they use the bathroom, and where did they store their bags? All these were a mystery to him. So he decided to take a look for himself. It wasn’t too hard as there were plenty of seats at the back of the plane that were empty. He wandered back where the flight attendants were seated and thought of what he would say to them.

I’m wondering if you could pour me another drink, he asked her. I know drink service has finished but I’m parched and this is a long-distance flight so-“

“What would you like?”

“I would like a gin and tonic.”

The drink would need ice cubes, which had to be scooped out from the bowl at the bottom of the trolley. It was a good thing he didn’t mind waiting.

Heard the sharp hiss of the carbon dioxide in the tonic water rise out of the bottle. The flight attendant was so tall that she had to lean over the drinks table. He thought she looked extremely sexy in her uniform; her stockings shimmered in the dim light of the cabin whilst her face took on an air of studied concentration as she measured the gin and filled the glass.

Waiting for the drink was part of the satisfaction, and when it finally arrived he was more than ready for it.

“ would you like something to go with it?”

He thought for a moment.

“I’ll take some nuts if you have them.”

She picked up some nuts and put them on a steel plate, handed them to him, and took hold of the trolley again.

Stop a minute, he told her. Why don’t you sit down with me? If you have time I mean.

She looked at him, assessing the situation.

“Well, I don’t suppose that would be a problem for just a few minutes…”

The flight attendant squeezed into one of the seats (she really was tall) and he got in beside her. She was like a praying mantis with her legs perched up high towards her arms.

A minute later they were talking about how she got to being an airline worker; whether she liked the job or not.

“It’s funny, when I was younger I never went on holidays. I was always afraid of flying and for that reason I decided to overcome my fear, and this seemed like the best way of doing that.”

Yes, they said that if I took a stimulator first it would allow me to experience the feeling of being in an airplane without leaving the ground.

The noise of the plane’s engine started to get very loud and it felt as though it was moving faster now. Just as he finished his drink the plane began to move upward some more and he felt the pressure in the cabin increasing.

“I want to learn how to pilot a plane one day, when you’re in control of the plane it must be a wonderful feeling to be taking people on a journey somewhere exciting.”

He looked around at the passengers. They were all sitting by themselves and he noticed that there were no children on board either. He started to feel strange and he wondered why this was happening.

“ Where is this flight going?” He asked after a gap in the conversation.

“It’s not going anywhere, we’re flying for an unlimited time until passengers decide they want to leave.

“Then what happens to them?”

Usually when a passenger has grown tired of eating all the food we send another jet to come and collect them and get them to the nearest airport.”

So the rest of the passengers are not really flying anywhere?

“Exactly. Most of our passengers are perfectly content to stay on board as long as two weeks. They have everything they need on board anyway, and they are much safer up here than on the ground.”

“But don’t they get bored?”

You would think so, but many of our passengers have been coming back for several years. “

He looked out the window. Whether it was day or night was impossible to tell. The air he was breathing in was neither fresh nor stale. Every hour the cabin was refreshed with new “air” from the tanks, to stop the air becoming stuffy and to minimize the spread of germs in the air.  

He read somewhere that time moved slower at the top of a mountain than it did on the flat land. In that case, was time moving at all when you were flying in the air, when it was only night for a few hours until it became day again?

 It was a strange way to spend a holiday, never visiting anywhere; but people did all kinds of crazy things on holiday.

“Well, how long do you think I should spend up here?”

“That depends. Did you wish to speak to any of our flight attendants? You can arrange to have dinner in the private dining area if you want to.”

Suddenly the idea of being alone on the aircraft was starting to get improve.

“Would it be possible to have dinner with you?” He already felt comfortable with her even though they had only been talking for twenty minutes.

I’m having dinner

“Yes that will be fine. But will you let me tell you something first? I usually say know when people ask me to have dinner with them. “

“they must really ask you a lot then.”

“They do. But that’s not why I turn them down.”

 Im aware that men look at me in a certain way, maybe they have a fantasy about me based on my appearance, but it’s not how I am in person. I would hate for you to get the wrong idea about me.”

He picked up his bag and went to the washroom. There were the usual assortments of toiletries, hairbrush and toothbrush for him to use. He thought about changing his clothes but then he decided he was fine the way he was. Actually, he was feeling confident and he probably could have changed into the dressing gown and been ok like that. He wouldn’t normally have been so confident, of course. But the fact she had said yes, just like that, made him feel so much better about things. 

Lena was wearing slim-fitted black jeans that matched the colour of her hair. She had paired her top with a sexy patterned scarf and black choker. She looked much less formal than when she was in her flight uniform, but he was just as attracted to her now, if not more.

They were sitting in a small back room in the plane, with a large table and several chairs positioned around it. The usual hum of the plane’s engines could not be heard and the room was hushed and quiet.

‘So is this where you do your flight attendant work?’ he asked her?

“We do most of our safety exercises and procedures here.”

“It sounds so interesting. I’m sorry that they don’t do the pre-flight safety demonstrations any more. I used to enjoy watching those, it was always interesting seeing their expressions as they mimed the use of an inflatable safety vest….”

“We find that most passengers prefer to watch a recorded video instead of focusing so much on a flight attendant. The eye contact makes them feel uncomfortable and they don’t know where to look.”

“Maybe I understand, but it’s going to take me some time to get used to this new way of doing things.”

“What is it you miss about the way it used to be done?”

“The amount of dedication they had for their craft, and they way they could perform with a sense of theatre.”

She smiled.

“Did I do that when I poured your drink just now?”

“ you really put all your effort in to it.”

“Besides, air travel has changed in so many ways. The way passengers board the plane, the safety requirements and the lack of space.

DO you know how much the standard seat width has shrunk since the 1960s?

He looked at his glass of wine and admired the slender stem. They had clearly thought a great deal about the tableware they provided. It wasn’t just that they were nice glasses, but that they were the perfect shape for the table and could hold just the right amount of liquid.

“I’m not sure.”

“Well, it’s a lot. Standard seat width for a commercial flights is now thirty inches. Many of our customers request seats with extra legroom but we can’t offer them anything unless they sit in the emergency exits, or First class. Well, we’d like all passengers to have the same standard of comfort but unfortunately that’s not always comfortable. So we can only give them these reduced-space seats at the back of the plane.

“Well, let’s see what we have for dinner. Are you hungry?”

He looked at the menu which was printed in extra fine font on slightly crinkled paper.  It was the usual mishmash of international food. For the appetiser they were offering seared prawns with simmered avocado qenelles. The mains looked more interesting. The fish was red snapper, grilled and served with a hot wasabi dressing. Meat was a loin of pork with grapefruit jam and chorizo.

It was the kind of food that would be difficult to reheat without losing all the texture. They must have had an amazing team back there in the kitchen if they could produce this kind of food.

“I will have the prawns, followed by the pork. That’s it.”

It was nice eating in a plane; you only had two options and either one was likely to be as good as the other so that he never felt any misgivings about his choices.

‘You know something,” he said to her as she was pouring the wine; ‘I’ve never had a bad meal on a plane.”

“Really? I’m happy to hear it, but you don’t have to be so polite with me.”

“No, I’m serious. Everything has always been fresh, served at the correct temperature, well-presented…. You’d be amazed by the number of restaurants that can’t get that right.”

“We just want everything to be just right for our guests.”

‘But now I think about it, there’s not much they could do if I did’t like the food. I suppose I could try asking for another one. But it’d be exactly the same anyway…”

“Yes, we’d only be able to offer you the same dish cooked exactly the same way.”

The plane carried on flying cruise control. It was almost as if it was following a pre-determined course.

“Do you ever get tired of flying? He asked her.

“Why do you ask me that?”

Just being stuck in the air. Only seeing the airports and never going anywhere exciting.”

“Well we get three days off after every ten. That usually gives us some time to do something exciting.”

“What about when you’re on the plane? All those stupid passenger requests and screaming babies. It would be enough to tip me over the edge.”

“That’s why I’m only working these planes.  I only serve single passengers like you. Besides, we get used to serving difficult passengers after working a few weeks.”

“Do you? That’s interesting….”

He didn’t know what to say next. He admired the curvature of her neck. It was amazing how unique a woman’s body was; there were always different body parts that drew to his attention. As well as being aroused by the whole package, he was able to be stimulated by very specific features as well. Lena’s ears were long, shaped like treble clefs, and her mouth was so enticing he felt that he could fall into it.

“Aren’t you ever afraid of the plane crashing, or having engine failure?”

“Of course, it goes through my mind. We have the best safety measures in place, but there’s always the possibility that something may go terribly wrong. If it does, then we would need everybody off the plane as quickly as possible.”

“You would let the passengers off the plane first, or would you rush past them to the emergency exits?”

“We would be required to make sure that everyone was able to reach the doors first, otherwise we wouldn’t be doing our jobs. But I’m sure that some people would not be so altruistic as that.”

“You’re damn right they wouldn’t. It would be everyone for themselves; but that’s not what always happens on flight disasters, with many heroic examples of bravery from members of the cabin crew, I’ve come across so many.
And that’s not all.”

“We don’t have to talk about this any more. That’s a hell of a dress that you’re wearing.”

“Would you like to go somewhere else to talk? There is a room out back which is much quieter for us, and would give us more privacy. I can go there with you if you like, and we can continue the conversation.”

They went into another room that was even more luxurious than where they had been before. There were gilt tables with decorated wine glasses on them and pictures of celebrities who had flown in the plane before him.

“Would you like to hear some music?”

He thought it seemed like a good idea. He had never been on a plane when they were playing music and he thought it seemed such a good plan.

“What are you going to play me? Something ambient like “Little fluffy clouds?” Or music for airports?”

“Who is that by? Brian Eno? I don’t think I know that one.”

“Whenever I’m flying, I always imagine something very ethereal and almost ghostly like Enya or something very solemn and funereal.”

“Ghostly? Hmm, I think I know what you’re getting at. But we don’t like our passengers to be led down such a path where they could be depressed, or think about the supernatural.”

She went over to the music system and pulled out one of the discs.

 As soon as he heard the opening bars, he identified the music.

“A little Night music?”

“Yes. Very well known but it adds something when you hear it on a plane.”

Indeed, it sounded so light; the strings were pulling him higher in the air.

“Do you want to know something about the other passengers?”

Like what exactly?

“Haven’t you noticed anything a little unusual about them?

“They look like typical business passengers.” And it was true, they did.

“What if I said that they are in fact all aliens, travelling back to their own planet after a long time abroad.”

“I’d say that you were crazy. I would never believe you in fact.”

She laughed.

“yes, I knew you wouldn’t believe it, because they look so normal. That’s why we chose them. They blend in perfectly, don’t they? Nobody would ever know.”

What am I doing here? Am I the only human here?”

“No of course not. There are all of the other attendants. As well as me.”

He looked at her carefully.

“That’s a relief.”


“So what happens now? Does the plane travel far? Couldn’t that take a very long time?”

“Do you want to go back home, is that it?”

“Eventually, sure.”

“You can leave any time you want. Just open one of the doors.”

He looked around himself. There’s no way I’d make it alive, he thought to himself.

“So are you going to stay on the plane after all?”

“It’s not so bad. I can get all the food I need here. And the in-flight entertainment that you provide leaves little to be desired.”

“You’re ok about the aliens?”

“They just look like normal passengers.”

“Yes, they’re really harmless. Like good-natured tourists.”

“Well, most of them are. We haven’t had any problems so far. We try to give them what they want, that way everyone’s happy.”

The plane kept on going. The alien’s home planet was thousands of light years away and it was months until they landed. As it happens, he’s still on the plane, somewhere, someplace, some time.

Leftover women

China is in the news for many reasons. There is the on-going trade war with the United States….. The persecution of the Uighur minority. The country continues its dizzying rise to modernity, with cities being completely redesigned in a few years.

One interesting social phenomenon that has recently been documented is the rise of the ‘leftover woman,’ (Sheng nu). This derogatory phrase refers to a woman over 26 (or thereabouts), who is not married or in a relationship. From the point of view of the labeller, its not a positive term, and it’s unlikely that any woman would want to refer herself as such. Nevertheless, with more and more young women in China choosing to delay or in some cases avoid marriage completely, many young women are so scared of being given the classification that they are doing whatever they can to find a husband.

Marriage markets are popping up in towns across the country. Here, parents display photographs and mini biographies of their daughters in the hope of attracting potential partners. And on dates, where women are trained to act as demurely as possible, they are advised to not assert themselves in any way or mention their careers.

A weekly marriage market in Shanghai

Who might be considered ‘leftover’?

In theory, any woman above a certain age without prospects could be considered a leftover woman. However, it’s typically used to denigrate women who choose to ignore Chinese culture and tradition that says they should marry and start a family as soon as possible.

Any woman over 26 faces great social and familial pressure to look for a husband.

What are the reasons for the leftover women?

China’s growing middle class are increasingly well-educated; often much more so than their parents. They study more, often overseas. The one-child policy introduced in 1980, meant that women born in this period are considered by the older generation to be the most spoiled in history. Yet they are also perhaps the most fortunate, being born at a time of greater prosperity and fortune than their parents and grandparents. Women who grew up without siblings (even though parents typically preferred a son) had more of their parent’s attention and were able to enjoy a better education going further than what would normally be available to women in families with sons. As a result, many of today’s young women are focusing on their careers, choosing to provide for themselves and get ahead.

Lack of suitors

The men in China are sometimes unfairly depicted in American cinema as unreliable, addicted to gambling and alcohol. Whether this is the reality, there must be a reason why Chinese women are choosing not to marry. Whilst 28 is hardly considered old for women in Western countries, it’s different in China. Many men want somebody younger than them, which explains why so many Chinese women are marrying abroad. It is also worth noting that women are often so much more educated that men cannot accept the prospect of being married to someone more successful than they are.

“Leftover women” seems to be a handy term to describe a problem that isn’t really a problem at all. The emergence of women with greater economic independence and education is of great advantage to China, especially when women become successful internationally. The population of China has stayed steady and  -even though the one-child policy has been rescinded – families are having smaller families anyway, reducing the poverty and the starvation of the Cultural Revolution.

Women

With 15 million more men than women in China, there are is a shortage of brides. It’s strange that it’s the men who are often being left behind, – by a rapidly modern society – but women are the ones being labelled as ‘leftover’.

Hint of misogyny?

To some, the term “leftover woman” is an attempt to stigmata a certain segment of women who are using more freedom that is now available to them, exactly the freedom that men have always had available to them as a matter of course. And more to the point, people aren’t happy that women are no longer happy to just stay at home and look after children. At the heart of the issue is there are women in China, a country considered at the other side of the world geographically and politically, who are closer to women in the west than those in small villages only a few hundred miles away.

Only In Asia

Crazy Rich Asians

Credits:

Director: Jon Chu

Starring:
Constance Wu
Henry Golding
Gemma Chan
Lisa Lu
Nico Santos
Awkwafina
Ken Jeong
Michelle Yeoh

Not long after it was announced that the book by Kevin Kwan was going to be made into a movie the internet started talking. Were they going to do justice to the book? Were they going to go the way of Ghost in the Shell and whitewash the main character? Fears were laid to rest last October when the magazine Entertainment Weekly revealed that all the characters were to be played by Asian actors. From there, the buzz just grew and what looked like a fairly small romantic comedy has now become on of the year’s biggest hits (in October, the film had grossed over $236 worldwide). By now several of the film’s actors have gone from relatively unknown to huge stars, and Constance Wu has become the poster child for the Asian American acting community,

How did we get here? Remember when the film The Joy Luck CLub did something similar? Or Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon? Or even Memoirs of Geisha? But Crazy Rich Asians feels different. Whilst those earlier films felt tied to a sense of the exotic Asian culture that probably only exists for westerners, this is very much an Asian film made by Asians on their terms and not pandering to western ideas about what Chinese culture is about.

From the beginning, we’re in familiar romantic territory, with the central couple Nick and Rachel cooing over a shared dessert plate. As in the book, Rachel is an economics professor, and there is a very neat scene where she uses a poker game to demonstrate the rules of game theory. There is a touch of wonder about the film, with fantastic scenes of characters jetting off around the world in private jets, helicopters and top-end sports cars. The director is no stranger to magic, having made both editions of Now You See Me.

Rachel and Nick are in love, both work at NYU, and seem to share everything including dessert. It’s is going great but she has never met anyone from Nick’s side of the family, so Nick suggests she comes with him to his best friend’s wedding in Singapore.

The term rich can mean anything from well-off to loaded and it’s with the typical modesty of the truly loaded that Nick refers to his family as ‘comfortable’. In fact, Nick comes from one of the most successful families in Asia, the Young family. In a brilliant scene, Rachels best friend Peik Lin (Awkwafina) explains how they came from China and bought the first buildings of the city state, becoming the old money kings of Asia.

In another scene, we see the family having just taken ownership of the stuffy Calthorpe Hotel in London. Having established just how rich the Young family are, the film wastes no time in showing us how much fun they have with it, and the stupendous luxury they live in. Maybe we’re not supposed to be impressed by such conspicuous consumption, yet I felt both exhilarated by the wealth on display and so happy to see the characters enjoying it.

I doubt that Singapore will look so good or has ever looked like this on film before. From the airport, Nick takes Rachel, along with his best friend Colin and Araminta to one of the Hawker markets in Singapore. All of the chefs have spent their lives making the same food and some have even been awarded michelin stars. Yes, a bit of travelogue maybe but the scenes cement the film’s Asian location firmly in our minds (in fact the film spends a mere 5 minutes of screen times in New York before zipping to Taiwan, Singapore and the mysterious sounding Samsara Island.

Rachel’s college roommate has her own mansion, but it’s nothing when we see the family home of the Youngs. Inspired by the Hall of Mirrors and Donald Trump’s toilet, Peik Lin lives in a garish new build, perfect for her father who looks like an Elvis impersonator, but Nick’s family live in a house so  grand that it has no GPS signal and is guarded by turbaned soldiers carrying bayonets.

The central drama is how Nick must convince his family and friends that Rachel (American born Chinese) is somehow good enough to be his wife and to be part of the Young family. Ever since Nick was raised by his Amah, he had been brought up to become the new CEO of the family company (this part was more detailed in the book, and the film perhaps wisely ignores the business side of things). Rachel’s reception is hardly warm, and it only gets worse as she fails to appreciate the sacrifice made by Nick’s mother, and the sense of duty of being married. But if anything, Araminta’s friends are even worse. Not only has Rachel committed the crime of being American, she’s also not even ‘that’ pretty, and hasn’t had the surgical enhancement of many of the women in their social circle. While the women Rachel meets are pretty ghastly, Nick’s cousin Astrid becomes Rachel’s guide to surviving the horrors of the bachelor party. Indeed, Astrid serves to remind us that life in high society is not so perfect; Astrid’s husband is having an affair.

Finding American-Asian actors who could play the parts must have taken some doing. The producers revealed that they could have chosen hundreds of actors for the part of Rachel Chu alone. Constance Wu made the Asian stereotype of the tiger mother in Fresh off the Boat completely likeable character. Whilst Rachel is in some ways a little too passive, there’s no denying that Wu has done an admirable job in creating an emotionally engaging character, and there’s some pretty snappy remarks made by Rachel, even if they get slightly drowned out by the background noise, the soundtrack is fast like the best comedies that Hollywood used to make. Henry Golding (Nick) was a slightly controversial choice –  some felt that it was wrong to use a half British actor – but his English accent is made plausible when you consider that half the scions of Chinese CEOS are educated in English boarding schools. British actress Gemma Chan plays Nick’s cousin as a slightly tragic figure: a woman married to a less successful man who feels she must hide her designer purchases so that he won’t feel intimidated. In a lovely scene near the end, she leaves him behind in their house, but not until she has picked up a secreted pair of earrings which she had bought earlier on in the film but never felt she could wear them. 

Peik Lin (hilarious) is like the fairy godmother character, helping Rachel to choose not one but two perfect dresses to wear, first at the party to mark Colin’s wedding and again at the wedding itself. Frankly, I’d be surprised if the film doesn’t win at least a best costume award at the academy’s next year. I’ve not seen so many beautiful dresses since the Devil Wears Prada and the film is as stylish and beautiful as any film from the fifties. The scene where Peik Lin and Edison select designer dresses is going to be one of the scenes endlessly re-watched, and it should be: it’s hilariously over the top and camp, whilst allowing Sally Yeh’s extremely jaunty mandarin cover of Material Girl to be played.

If much of the attention is given to dresses, there’s a fair bit of partying going on too. Bachelor parties are usually hookers and drugs, declares Bernard Tai, but that’s boring. How about a party on a yacht, with hundreds of dancers and a flare gun that shoots off into the ocean? It’s gloriously excessive and fun in a tasteless way, and the actor who plays Tai knocks every scene he is in out of the park. He’s played by American comedian Jimmy O Yang, and I can’t see wait to see what he does next. The fact that he alone of the male characters has a stomach that overhangs his belt is even funnier.

Alongside all the dresses, the film whips along at a cracking pace, and then the wedding hits us by surprise, being unexpectedly moving, touching and beautiful. The film achieves another brilliantly emotional and real scene when Rachel’s mother arrives in Singapore after Rachel has left Nick.  In the world of Mrs Young – and the numerous aunties that spend their time in bible meetings and making dumplings with their children – it’s family that comes first. The message for Rachel is clear – you can’t understand, because Americans always think about their own interests rather than making sacrifices for their family.

It is a very shallow film in lots of ways but ends up telling more about Asia than the well-meaning but turgid Joy Luck Club. Sometimes the frivolous and trivial can be very serious. By now, I should make it clear that I loved everything about the film and I am booking my next holiday in Singapore.

Closing comments: a wonderful film that does justice to a classic novel. Some wonderful moments and feelgood ending make it the perfect film to watch with family or as a romantic evening with a loved one.

Fresh off the Boat – TV’s hottest Asian comedy

fresh

One of the best American comedies is finally being shown in the UK. If you haven’t watched it, here’s what you need to know.

Although it was billed as the first show to feature a predominantly Asian cast, the shoiw would not have lasted very long if that was all it had going for it. Actually, the show is not just a comedy that a particular ethnic group can approeciatae. It’s a great family show which packs a lot into each 20 minute episode.

Series 1 was fine but by Series 2 they had kicked things up a gear and were making classic episodes such as Michael Chang Fever and The Real Santa.

The show fiollows a American Taiwanese family who move from the Asian –friendly Washington neighborhood to all-white Orlando DC.

If the first season focused mainly on the central character of Eddie, the next started to  look more at the marriage of Jessica and Louis. Now I’ve not seen either perform in many other shows much but boy can they do a great back and forth.

Of course, the writing is extremely sharp and so fresh and funny.  The show pokes fun at the nineties setting. Although it takes place in what is clearly present day America, there are wonderful resferences to things ony people in the nineties can remember (yes, from Pogs to Beanie Babies and the rise of the early internet, it’s all here, lovingly recreated).

Jessica is very clearly the kind of ambitious mother who wants the best for the children (a Tiger Mum before the word was actally used) but the show wiuld not bew enjoyable if she was just a terrible and scolding woman. In fact in episode after episode she comes across as someone who simply loves and cares for her children that she wants the best for them

For example, she gets a position helping at the school play only to realize that the play is an excuse for the children to stand around onstage in fruit and animal costumes (standount epsisode). By the end, she comes round to the idea that the play is harmless fun and goes along with the other parents by clapping at the end (only to mutter, this is all a complete waste of time).

In another episode, she decides that Eddie should join a piccolo club; ‘Do you know how many unclaimed marching band scholarships go unclaimed every year?) And then, when the insufferable goody-two shoes Jewish boy deserts Eddie during a Les Mis performance, she agrees to attend a Beastie Boys concert in his stead.

There are strong messages in each episode. For example, a noted storyline looked at how Jessica felt that she was losing touch with her Chinese roots. Suddenly the family start eating food with chopsticks and the boys are marched off to after-school Chinese lessons.

For a a family show they put some edgy humour in. Eg, when their white neighbor offers to play some records where Frank Sinatra makes racially insensitive remarks about Sammy Davis and Junior.

The couples’ love for each other is never in doubt. If there is a better show on TV I’v not seen it.

Here’s a short list of my favourite episodes:

“Coming from America” (Season 3)

badfakes

The family go to Taiwan so that Louis can patch things up with his brother. After her attempts to prove her Taiwanese heritage go wrong, Jessica realizes that America is now their natural home.

The scene where Jessica ends up buying the ‘bad fakes’ (counterfeit Nike trainers) at a street market is hilarious.

“Jessica Place” (Season 2)

A spoof of the nineties show which gets a lot of references in the series.

Phil's

“Phil’s Phaves” (Season 2)

An episode that looks at the very early days of the internet. When the Huangs read an unfavourable interent review that describes their restaurant as boring, they try to make it more fun.

“So Chineez” (Season 1)

When perpetual slacker Eddie wants to represents Jamaica in the school’s UN preoject, his mum is mad and insists he is given China. When Eddie questions what’s cool about China, she lays it down like a boss: “You know what’s cool about China? A wall you can see from space. Who invented Gunpowder? China? Gunpowder, the compass, gambling… China! China! China!”

sochineez

“Success Perm” Season 1

A really funny show because for many Asian people a perm is a sign of success despite the fact that it makes them

“Dribbling Tiger, Bounce Pass Dragon” (Season 2)

Louis’s attempts to help Eddie’s team win a Basketball game fall falt, so he teaches them how to be the best team at making fouls.

“Success Perm” Season 1

A really funny show because for many Asian people a perm is a sign of success despite the fact that it makes them look ridiculous.

success

Sex with Asian women

There are lots of ways that Asian women stand out from women of other races but for me the number one area is in the bedroom. It’s no accident that amongst prostitutes Asian women can and do charge higher prices than any other races. So what makes them so special?

First of all, it’s their attitude.

Many Asian women can appear pretty demure in terms of how they behave and act. You don’t see many women from Asian countries wearing miniskirts or high heels. But that doesn’t mean they don’t enjoy sex. They simply aren’t going to advertise it in the same way as other women do.

Next – mannerisms in the bedroom. Asian women are very subtle in the bedroom and in my experience this is one of the best things about them. I simply can’t stand the over the top way women of other countries shout at the top of their lungs during the act. I also don’t understand the appeal of talking dirty during sex which is just as well because I would be terrible at it.

Their consideration. I was recently with a Chinese woman who took my clothes off and neatly folded them and placed them in a neat pile before we made love. It told me as much about her as anything else she went on to do.

Thirdly, they are more likely to want to please you in bed. This includes before and after, and it’s common for girls to want to massage you afterwards as well, which is pretty awesome when you think about it.

sexy-asian-women-17-2

There are a lot of Asian porn stars who have become are very famous and you can get an idea as to what makes Asian women great from watching these videos. For a start, it’s clear that they are usually much more petite than western women.

Their sexual appetite is strong (I’m not sure if its higher than other races) and they are energetic too.On a physical level they have minimal body hair and their skin feels amazing.

It might seem hard to believe that it could be this great but there really is nothing to not like about the whole Asian experience. I mean really great. Prepare to have your mind and your body blown away.

Even if you feel inexperienced sexually by the standards of western women, you’re going to be with women from cultures where it’s unusual to start dating or having sex until their twenties. Don’t worry, about which country they come from. It’s going to be good whether you choose a women from Thailand, the Phillipines or Japan,or China (you get the idea).

The fact is that I did not have sex in my early twenties made me feel inadequate. I didn’t feel accepted by women in my country. Now I’m realizing that maybe it wasn’t anything wrong with me at all. If you’re a white guy and you’re constantly made to feel not good enough or lacking in some way, there is a simple solution: look east, young man. 

Is the Korean wave over?

In response to the THAAD defence shield, China retaliated by cancelling a concert in Shanghai for the K-Pop Idol group Exo.

Now people are worried that it could lead to further restrictions on other K-pop performers, or TV programmes. The ban is particularly worrying as China is perhaps the biggest exporter of Korean music and TV programmes, all part of the movement known as Hallyu or Korean Wave. Shares have already fallen in Korean stocks after the news.

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The demise of Hallyu has been reported many times. A backlash from other countries, who resent Korea’s dominance on the airwaves has led to restrictions on the amount of Korean songs played on the radio in Cambodia, and China and Japan have tried to limit the number of Korean dramas shown on the airwaves.

The main markets for Korean entertainment has been in other Asian countries but as they develop their own entertainment (or simply improve the ones they already have) there will be less dominance by Korean culture. This is particularly true of Japan and China who have often been fiercely nationalistic.

Sadly, the conglomerates which manufacture Korean groups and singers have simply been churning out too many of the same looking and sounding groups. No-wonder the public are losing interest. Internationally, there hasn’t been a song anything like as popular as Gingham Style, which was nearly 4 years ago.

No-one can doubt the popularity of K-Pop. SNSD’s Gee has ranked a phenomenal 166,417,458 youtube views, but the group haven’t been able to match the super hit (the departure of lead singer Jessica has really hurt the group’s chances).

It’s well-known that the government of Korea have interested in TV and music production as part of promoting the Spirit of Korea overseas. But nearly all of it been on pop-culture which has meant that traditional aspects of Korean culture have lost out. It could be time for a change of tack. Changes in music and TV come about thick and fast but people will (I think) always love Korean food, the people and the history of Korea.

The Joy Luck Club

When Wayne Wang was brought out to direct the film of Amy Tan’s The Joy Luck Club, it must have seemed like a dream come true for fans of Asian cinema. With Oliver Stone as producer and several of the hottest Asian actresses in tow this looked like a surefire hit.

Unfortunately, it really missed the mark. Instead of being the moving epic that they were clearly going for, the film is a terrible and incoherent mess.

Let’s see: there are four daughters of four mothers, who are all members of the titular club. They moved to America it seems at different times and have made a point of bringing up their children as American rather than Chinese.

So the film had my interest but the flashbacks are totally intrusive and serve to prevent any sense of time and place. Now, like most American /Chinese productions, the characters speaking English. Not that this is a problem, as the daughters were brought up to speak English. Would adult Chinese women speak English alone with their friends? No, of course they wouldn’t.

Joy_luck_club_movie_cast

Now, in the flashbacks, the characters only speak Chinese. This is fine. These scenes are terribly melodramatic though. We are supposed to be shocked by the barbarity of Chinese culture and the way that women were treated. Each mother is given a flashback scene in which some awful event from the past is revealed, I lost interest after a while.

Then, the film takes us back to nineties New York, where their daughters live life of unabashed privilege, complete with yuppie boyfriends. These scenes feel like a Woody Allen film without the wit.

The Joy Luck Club does not deliver any emotional payoff. Each scene unfolds with the predictability of a thousand soap opera cliches.

Director Wang was never given the same budget to work with again. Vivian Wu appeared in Peter Greenaway’s The Pillow book, whilst  Lauren Tom played the role of Ross’s girlfriend in Friends. Fans of American-Chinese films would have to wait until Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon for their next piece of Chinese cinema.